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Monday, December 26, 2022

The Microsoft/Activision Merger Is A Terrible Idea. Here's Why.

A few weeks ago, I stopped into my local game store. The manager of the store, a very nice and knowledgeable guy named Drew, asked me this question: “What do you think about the Microsoft and Activision merger?”

To that point, I hadn’t really given a lot of thought to it. I have a reflexive, knee-jerk reaction to big corporate mergers about them being anticompetitive, but without giving a lot of thought, I mumbled out an answer and took my leave when the store got a little too crowded.

After some reflection, I’ve come to the conclusion that not only is this merger a bad idea, it could be the single worst idea to hit gaming in a long time, almost on par with “let’s make a game based on ET.”

NES Replay: Metroid

Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Released: August 1986

I hate the momiker "Metroidvania."

I mean no disrespect to latter-day Castlevania, but Metroid came out in 1986, Metroid 2 in 1991 and Super Metroid in 1994. The first Castlevania that a similar structure to the Metroid series came out in 1997. This isn't to say that the early Castlevania games were bad. Far from it! They're great! However, they are not "metroidvanias" and didn't join the same genre for 11 years.

But if you don't call the genre "metroidvania" what do you call it? "Action-Exploring?" Too wordy. "Metroids?" Nah, that's generic. I argue that the only reason that the name "metroidvania" has stuck is because it's catchy.

Metroid is much more notable for where it ended up than where it started. Super Metroid is undoubtedly one of the best games of all time. It has a tremendous sense of place, along with ominous music and some truly creepy bosses. When your sequel is one of the best games of all time, it's hard to go backwards. When you've seen Kraid expand from taking up one full screen to two full screens, then firing pieces of his body at you, it's hard to go back and fight a Kraid that's the same size as you, you know?

Monday, December 19, 2022

NES Replay: The Legend of Kage

Developer: Taito
Publisher: Taito
Released: August 1985

With a few notable exceptions, most early games had you locked in a pitched battle against the controls. Developers cared about stealing your quarters while providing the illusion of fun, and so their to-do list for most games was:

1)     Find a way to take money from players.
2)     Make a cute mascot or something.
(...)
99)    Make movement fun.

Enter The Legend of Kage (pronounced “kah-gay”). Our friends at Taito had once again cracked a code: people wanted to play games that felt fun to play. Imagine that! 

Released in 1985 for the arcade, The Legend of Kage had you playing a ninja named Kage who’s attempting to rescue a princess. The movement is so fluid that it's the closest thing to a kung-fu video game released to this point. Taito really wanted to make you feel like a ninja. The titular legendary character can leap the entire length of the screen, climb a temple just by jumping, and land on tree branches, all the while firing shurikens at the plentiful ninja who oppose his path. 

Wednesday, December 14, 2022

What the Minx is HBO Max Doing?

I really liked the show Minx.

Minx was set at a fictional male porn mag in '70s LA. It alternated between raunchy sex romp, let's-put-on-a-show enthusiasm, workplace comedy, and romance while being funny the whole time. It's the kind of show that could have run for seasons without outstaying it's welcome.

It ran on HBO Max. If you don’t know anything about HBO Max, you should know that it’s becoming a tire fire now that it's under the aegis of Warner Bros Discovery, a merger of equals between Warner Brothers and… well, Discovery. Yes, Discovery, the network full of reality TV shows somehow merited equal footing with Warner Brothers. Don’t ask me how.

Monday, December 12, 2022

NES Replay: Elevator Action

Developer: Taito
Publisher: Taito
Released: August 1986

Taito has an interesting story. Like a lot of the early companies, Taito didn't start with video games. In Taito's case, it started because a small-time hustler kept trying and failing to start profitable companies.

Michael Kogan was born to Jewish parents in Odessa in 1920, and his family fled Russia to avoid the Revolution. (While Odessa is now part of Ukraine, at the time it was part of the Russian State.) They settled in Manchuria, which was occupied by Japan at the time but had a large Jewish population. He moved to Tokyo in 1939, which is a wild time to move to Tokyo. He stayed for most of the war, and then moved to Tianjin in China in 1944.

In 1944, he formed a business called Taitung. Taitung is a city in Taiwan, and I can't find any specifics that would indicate any relation to Kogan. Anyway, Taitung made wigs, floor coverings and hog bristles. I mean, why not diversify a bit? In 1950, Kogan fled China ahead of the Communist Revolution and settled in Tokyo.

In Japan, the name of his company, Taitung, was translated to "Taito." He tried to turn Taito into a clothing distributor, but it didn't pan out. By 1953, he had shuttered the clothing distributor and started a new company called Taito Trading Company. They started distilling vodka and importing vending machines.

Tuesday, November 29, 2022

The Americans: "Pilot" (S01E01)


And THAT is how you start a TV show.

I've never watched The Americans, even though I've always wanted to. During its first run, I didn't have cable and after that you could only watch it on Amazon Prime. Since it just started streaming on Hulu, I thought I'd see what all the fuss is about and holy crap.

It's funny to look back at the reactions to the pilot. Early reviews were like, "It's good, I guess. It shows some promise." Now that it's widely viewed as one of the greats, you're clearly able to see all the elements of the show and how they're going to produce conflict. I'm really excited for this.

In case you haven't watched the show, here's the setup: Philip Jennings (Matthew Rhys) and his wife Elizabeth Jennings (Keri Russell) are deep, deep, deep cover KGB agents who live a normal life in America with their two children. Their life looks perfect: Beautiful house, picturesque surroundings, a seemingly happy marriage. Not all is well.

Monday, November 28, 2022

Being Silly in a Serious World

I woke up this morning thinking about the song "Stewball" by Lonnie Donegan.


"Stewball" is a very old song. In most versions, the song is about a guy who's thinking about a really nice horse and wishing he'd bet on it. However, the Donegan version I've linked above is instead about a guy who's telling you about an iron grey mare named Stewball who blew in from a storm. The race hasn't happened yet, and the chorus is him telling you to "Bet on Stewball, and you might win."