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Thursday, March 13, 2014

NES Replay: 1985's Games Ranked

Here's a brief (and belated) ranking of the NES launch games.

18) Clu Clu Land - Poor controls and needlessly complicated instructions doom this one.

17) Stack-Up - So what exactly am I doing in this game again? I'm doing what with the what now?

16) Ice Climber - Poor collision detection and terrible jump physics ruin a good concept.

15) 10-Yard Fight - An eye-opening game, because it managed to make the fast-paced sport of American football boring.

14) Hogan's Alley - Boy, people were easily amused back in the day.

13) Wild Gunman - It's not a great light-gun game, but at least it gives you a challenge.

12) Donkey Kong Jr. Math - Because what makes more sense than combining a giant barrel-throwing ape and math?

11) Tennis - At least it's not Pong.

10) Gyromite - A great co-op game that happened to include an unnecessary robot.

9) Golf - A revolutionary game that's almost unplayable today.

8) Mach Rider - VROOM VROOM CRASH AIIIEEEE SO MUCH BLOOD WHY ARE THE ORGANS NOT GOING BACK IN

7) Baseball - Really bare-bones, but it's at least fun.

6) Pinball - One of the better pinball games at the time, and it still kind of holds up.

5) Excitebike - Some missed opportunities, but fairly decent overall.

4) Duck Hunt - SHOOT THE DOG.

3) Kung Fu - Ahhhh, so you have come to this dojo seeking a fight.

2) Wrecking Crew - "Mr. Mario, tear down these walls."

1) Super Mario Bros. - This little-known indie game may have a future, you know.